Well there you are, ratchetjawing with your friends, when a super hot Camaro shows up and an even hotter blonde gets out. Because she’s with a Frito Bandido, you pass on saying anything more than hello. Over a few days you develop a talking friendship with her, and you start thinking, hey this could be groovy. But then she moves away, calls a few times, but never calls again. And seldom if ever visits. So your fuzz vibes start and you realize that you just might have fallen for a call girl. After all, how many women in a small farm town , can afford a brand new Camaro? Why would she be wearing a sun dress, with boots made of fur type outers in the middle of July? Something smelled and it wasn’t me.
After awhile, of calling, texting, and begging like a dog for a bone, I finally figured, that hey once this turns around, and its already doing so, she’ll be there panting like a poodle at a convention. That’s when you say, here honey speak into the skin flute. Now Page 2:
Then there are the undercover call girls. Like down at the choke & gag. Ah isn’t she so sweet? Thing is, she sees you as a number. A paying customer, throwing down money to grab a root and growl, then lay on her a huge tip. The more you tip, the nicer she is to you. Thing is, even if and more than likely its not the real one, but even if you get a last name, and phone number, and even a facebook, addy, guess what? She will never ever, show up for an interview, or to take a shot at you being ANYTHING, She goes home to a dude named Bubba with no neck.
Unfortunately in this era, there isn’t any room for independent talent brokers. Nope, its either through an agency, or you don’t get no one, even in Burley. Here’s a scenario, from once in our recruitment ops. We pinged Craigslist, once for a pitch girl to pitch our aviation units attributes on TV. Wanted a real cowgirl. Some sweet cheeks from Twin Falls,(mind-you) Drove all the way to Layton Utah, in a blinding snow storm just to audition. She didn’t get the gig, we ended up contracting with one of those John Kingston wives. I kid you not. This super hot, all blonde with legs to harvest, showed up, from a talent joint in Provo Utah, one field over from PCS no less, and I gave her the gig. Who knows there might be a young’n from a sister wife some where. Thing is, its really bad that there isn’t a full on, full staged talent agency here in either Twin Falls or Burley. Yes that’s what I had in mind to do with TJ, have her front the talent agency. After all, there’s all too many timid Red Ridding Hoods, that truly are spooked by this big bawd wolf. Train talent, in both the ways to walk, talk, interview, act. I had a gal that ran a agency that got swallered up by John Robert, Powers Agency. Her place was called the Panache (pin-ah-sh) Agency. She said that what we needed was actors that could model, rather than models, who try to act. She’s dead on, but why not have a place, that taught these skills? More over combine that with a simple Broadcast Skills course, such as the Bob Bailey Western School of Broadcasting, did(yes I was a student) years ago. Sure radio has went digital, but hey with podcasting and true Webcasting, and there is a vast difference, teach new-bee’s how to do voiceovers, intro’s, interview skills for newscasts, etc might not be a bad concept. But hey, we got snookered. TJ, don’t call, don’t visit, and hardly even says anything on fb any more. Oh well, her loss.
So the next time, you find your getting to sniff a very tight behind, or that wink, as the coffee you drink, and think your going to get lucky, ask yourself this; Did I just fall for a Call girl? Also remember this; If the Chassis is Classy, Someone’s keeping it happy. Most likely that big guy named Bubba with no neck.