I hate getting old, I hate being alone ALL the time, and remembering what pills you took in the right sequence.

site dashrrj hedder

Saturday I did something I haven’t done in a long time. I heard my phone alarm go off, reached over turned it off and only woke up twice to eat and piss. Really did not care one iota about anything. Finally felt my ears burning up and that means fever. Took my temp, 107 oops need cooled down, so filled up the tub , climbed in and gradually lowered my core degrees. So got me a sandwich looked over what there was on FakeBook, which as usual there wasn’t anything except Chandra’s mom had sent me notice that Chandra was supposed to give me a jingle. With nothing coming in and my duty cycle on the manditory 12 hour rest requirement, I went back to dream land. In the dream I had, I was in some swanky apartment in I think Twin Falls, not quite sure, seems I was living there. Needed my required meds, and thought, okay a quick trip to Walgreen’s and was tieing my shoes when I thought, yes I do need my meds. Thank God I filled up on em last week, So got up again took another core reduction bath, grabbed some 100 weight coffee, and took my pills. As it is I swallow 9 different ones, besides my Metformin and Goody’s Powders. If I don’t take em in the right order, I forget which ones I just took and end up taking the same again and forget the rest. I hate getting old. I sat down and considered that in a month and a half I’ll be 59 years old, while that’s young in some circles, considering that 70% of my years have been hammer down at high octane at 200 miles an hour. Not only am I burning the candle at both ends, I’m burning it from inside out , and around the back. So went to the hospital to visit with kin of Indian Rick, who we lost Thursday morning. On the way home it occured to me, that with Indian Rick now gone, Ron died last May, outside of the Utah Charter there isn’t anyone except me of the original founders of the Hazzard Knytes. I’m not talking the members who joined after, nor our associate members, but the core members or founders , there is only me and the Utah Charter including Big John, and all left. If something happened to me, or Big John, I don’t really know who would be left to carry out the legacy and maintain the organization. Who is left? Maybe that; Knytes reunion, needs to happen sooner than later. That getting burned last week by that dang Pauletta and all, and PoohBear being reluctant to come out here to the cold west of Idaho, took a lot of spirit out of me. Quite frankly at this point I been thinking all I need is a good companion house keeper with physical pivlages to make sure I don’t die. Going trailer trucking may be my last haul quite frankly of my life, look, I came into this world in a truck, lived around trucks mostly all my life, got my own commercial license at age 18, have driven more accident free miles than most, have seen shit in a truck few have ever seen, damn near met my creator in a rig 3 times, I’m kinda like Nick Cage fearing driving Elenore in Gone in 60 Seconds, he’ll do it, but your still scared and don;t know if this will be your last haul. Likewise, I’m not really scared about getting my CDL, going to driving for SWIFT, nope, but I also think is this my last haul in life? Who will rebuild and run the Knyte’s radio station, Who will run SAMCRO TOEW? Who will lead the Knytes? Mostly who will care for and marry PoohBear, my Shelly? She can’t take care of herself, if I’m not there beside her ,  when her mom bites the sand, and her brother Kenny, goes trucking, PoohBear is going to be in one world of hurt, on many levels. So next week or so , I’m going in (maybe this is the vision I saw in my dream) checking into a head hospital, getting my meds and me balanced out, so I’m up to octane to hit the road the first of April for the retaining to go trailer  trucking. PoohBear had better get Kathy Smith, and or someone in here, or there might not be a Wolf for her to marry. 

See ya’ll after Church tonight at 18:00 hours that’s 6:00PM for all you none military out there. I need to go in and reduce my core temp again, and go to sleep.

my rrj sig

knyte tail1


2 thoughts on “I hate getting old, I hate being alone ALL the time, and remembering what pills you took in the right sequence.

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